Whatever Beauty
1.
A is in love, still she breathes in the phone, with a married man
who is teaching her to nurture her nurturing side. He has bought
her a pot-bellied pot, soil, rocks, and a large plant. Today, he will
teach her the sensual art of fertilizing roots.
2.
Although he tells her she’s stupid and lucky to have any man, B
clings to her guy. She suspects he’s cheating, tears through his
closet, then carefully refolds his sweaters, pants, marries his
socks. She asks me to send holiday cards to her parents’ house,
one less lie to sift through, she says, before asking, “How’s A?”
3.
See, for two months now I’ve dreamed myself in Cairo with a
man whose face presses into itself like an accordion when he
laughs. We drink tea, talk to children and pause five times
during the day to pray, then make love. He never mentions his
wife and six children in Durban. I never mention my lover in
Binghamton. Every night I wake with my hand pressed into my
mouth and hum a song that lulls my lover back to sleep.
4.
After she discovered I could be honest on paper, my mother sent
me a letter outlining my father’s affair with a sister from church.
She said she’d never give her body to another man. She said
nothing of the heart.