As Seen on TV
To be On Sale among the merchandise.
To AutoVac. To Turbo Fricassee.
To Flexx and Sex and Silicone. To Ice
the shoulder when it hurts, to be Pain-Free
at last. To be a 2-for-1, a deal,
a steal, the One Time Offer just today.
To be SmartAbs, click Here. To be the Real
McCoy, Not Sold in Stores so Don’t Delay.
Go Slenderize to Slim your arms and thighs.
A Super Home Alert to Save Your Life.
A Chippy Chopper Bloc to Pulverize
your onions in a flash. Your Ginzu Knife.
Your Back Relief. Your Better Baker Bowl.
Your fries, your chips, your Perfect Donut Hole.